Day 20 - Teresa's side of the story

I froze at the door, just a few meters from freedom, at least momentary freedom until this mad man shot me in the back as I made a ran for it.

Our eyes met. His eyes were red from all the crying, and now he looked more frightening than ever.

Run and take my chances? Or stay and take more punishment from this brute.

"Go on madam, make a run for it," his voice sounded so tired and defeated. "You deserve freedom, I've been an animal..."

"I-I wasn't running away," I heard myself say.

"Ah come on lady. I am not that clever but..."

"I was just shutting the door, for some privacy. Don't want people seeing you cry." The words came out of my mouth and I was shocking myself saying them. It was like somebody else had taken control, a very crazy somebody else.

But it worked. Bat-ears looked a little uncertain. Not quite convinced but he had enough doubt to half believe what I was saying.

"So what did you have in mind with an impotent man?"

"You're not impotent. We just need to talk about this a little. Do you have the time?"

"Talk about what?"

"Talk about the problem."

"I could kill you right now and cut you into many tiny pieces and feed you to the lions." But his voice was not convincing. I was no shrink but I now realized that all the tough talk was a shield. He used it as a shield. The violence he couldn’t control, that was clear and I wondered what the real source of it was. At least I now understood why his girl friend had never come back. If I were she I would not even feel safe far away in the States with this lunatic alive anywhere on earth.

"I'm sure you're quite capable of doing that. But if you killed me before I helped you, maybe you wouldn't have any other chance."

"Who said I needed your help?"

"You owe me an apology sir. You've just torn off some very expensive pieces of clothing that I had some sentimental attachment to. Look how you've ruined my skirt."

"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me."

"That's better. I have some news for you. I know what came over you. And it is a situation that can easily be cured."

"Can it?" I had all his interest now.

"Yes, but we need to talk about it." I knew I was making some good progress when he sat up, leaning against the wall, and basically making himself comfortable.

I had read many novels and seen hundreds of horror movies, (few of my friends believed that horrors were my favorite) now that fact could just save my life. I tried to remember as much as I could about all those sick psychos.

“Tell me a little about your life.”

“You don’t want to know that.”

“I do. I really do.”

“Okay. How about this one? When I had just finished school, there was this guy who had a loose tongue. Started talking to the cops about stuff I was supposed to have done. I knew where he used to drink with his girl friends. He was from a rich family and all. I had a gun and I dragged him out with his girl friends. Oh he begged and begged for mercy and even his two girl friends offered to do anything, I mean anything I commanded, if I spared their lives. It felt good to have power over those classy girls.

“I shot them at the back of their heads one by one. The man messed it all up by passing out. But I still shot him several times in the head, just to make sure that he wouldn’t be telling any more tales. Had to reload my small revolver you know…” His eyes had started shining again and I wondered what I was letting myself into.

“Is that what you wanted to hear?”

With a really big effort I pretended that I wasn’t horrified to my guts about what he had just said.

“That’s very nice. You see, behind every behavior and action, there is usually a reason. A very good reason.” I watched him carefully and to my amazement the shine in his eyes subsided. What the hell was this? What was this guy suffering from? “When we get to the bottom of it, we will be able to cure every problem you have.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“All I need is your co-operation. You have nothing to lose.”

“If you cure my problem, I’ll get you anything you want, anything…” Music to my ears, but it was coming from the mouth of a lunatic, unstable man.

“Let’s talk about your childhood. Tell me something about your mother.”

“Oh she was very beautiful. She liked to use lots of lipstick. Crimson red lipstick. Laughed a lot and drunk lots of beer…” the shine returned to his eyes. …”drunk so much beer that she had a big pot belly, like she was pregnant. She pretended to love me but she didn’t, the bitch loved the men who were always coming into her room. They would enter one after another, one after another and I would hear the creaking bed, making noise as they went up and down and I hated her, the whore. I really hated her…”

He was now up on his feet again and coming towards me, looking like he had totally lost it.

“I hated her, I hate women and that is why I always …”

“Stop ” I screamed at the top of my voice. But it’s like he never heard what I said. “Stoooop this minute!” I screamed in a louder voice.

Then I did something really crazy. I tried to get a hold of his shoulders to try and shake him back to reality. My hands didn’t quite get to him. I saw the slap a split second before it reached my face and somehow ducked. He missed and staggered across the room, ending up on his knees.

Mercifully, the fall across the room seemed to bring him back to his senses. He sat down again, a look of hopelessness on his face.

I now wondered which of the two of us was more insane than the other. It was probably me, to dare try and play at being a shrink. I was a raving lunatic.

All my life I was never one to give up easily and even now, I started desperately thinking of what to do next with this hopeless case.